- Do you suffer from an itch that you cannot scratch?
- Have you been startled from a sound sleep by movement under the skin of your perineum?
- Have you received 2nd-degree burns and/or been hospitalized attempting to urinate?
You are not alone. Since the development of miniature inter-dimensional gates, the number of reported cases of IDVD (Inter-Dimensional Venereal Disease) has steadily increased. If you suffer from any of these symptoms, seek professional assistance immediately. There is no known cure or treatment for IDVD, but trained psychological professionals can teach you coping skills.
Inter-dimensional coitus is illegal in thirty-nine of the forty star systems comprising the Spiral Arm Federation. The contraction of IDVD is considered sufficient punishment and balances the scales of justice. By interplanetary law, those infected with IDVD are exempt from prosecution. No questions may be asked by the attending physician or law enforcement to ascertain the source of the infection.
Please use inter-dimensional portals responsibly and keep all body parts in their proper space-time. Remember a momentary pleasure could cost you a lifetime of agonizing pain. All communications are completely confidential. Don’t face IDVD alone.
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